That means there are lots of fun things to do in and about town including shows and videos!
The Gentlemen of Long Pork are keeping busy too. Aside from gearing up for Sketchfest NYC and our big road trip for it. We’re excited to announce we have a Improv show coming up next week at the Playground!
Wednesday May 26th 8pm. $10
The Playground Theater
3209 N Halsted
Chicago, IL 60657
Seeing as it’s improv it’s going to be COMPLETELY new material. This is only our second show improvising together here in Chicago so come see us!
Okay aside from that you should also check out our good friend Devin Keast in his one man show:
Devin Keast, Gentleman and Sunshineface - Friday night May 28th. This will be his closing night, it’s also $10 and also at the Playground. Devin is great, if you went to our Harold Ramis show you’ve already seen him perform and fill in for Seth. So how could you not go?
If you’re not doing anything this weekend you should check out some dramatic theater completely unassociated with Long Pork:
Sinnerman Ensemble’s Days of Late – Now playing at the Viaduct and closing this weekend. Sinnerman is a local not for profit theater company here in Chicago out of Steppenwolf, awesome people, some of which donated to help get us to NY so go see their show!
John Morrison – (our photographer, webmaster, promoter and jack-of-all-things-not-performing-or-writing) has launched a new photo blog of his street photography for the Tribune. You should take a look: Focal Points.
Zoran – Put out a new video on LowCarbComedy.com! A few of us are in it (and by a few we mean everyone associated with Long Pork except Morgan and Seth.) So you should go watch that.
Actually… ya know what, since we’re such generous guys… here you go, we’ll just embed it for you. Here’s the link just in case.
Oh yeah… then there is this. But we’ll talk more about that later.
Okay pretty people, we’re done telling you what to do for now. Enjoy your summer!
Tonight is our first-ever probably-not-annual fundraiser!
“Hit Yourself in The Face With a Guitar!”
Come party with us, check us out, hit on us, and maybe try to take one of us home.
The show is $10 and it’s a fundraiser to help us send Long Pork to Sketchfest New York City! We’ve already been accepted, now we just need to figure out how the frak we can afford to get there. (Yes, I said frak, thankyouverymuch.)
In all seriousness we’ve got a great show for you folks tonight and we’re really excited to see all your smiling faces. For your $10 you’ll get to see two awesome bands who are graciously donating their time for us:
On top of that we’re really excited to announce that we’re partnering with Social Media Club Chicago and are an official after-party for tonight’s SMC meeting! So come, socialize, rock out, network and have a great time! There will also be raffles where we will be giving away some amazing prizes. It’s all to support a really great cause (us) so come on down and have a good time. Maybe we’ll buy you a drink!*
Also, if you can’t make it tonight, or it’s now Friday and you’re just now seeing this in Google Reader you can still help us out by donating: via PayPal.
Here’s the details:
The HideOut
1354 W. Wabansia Ave
Doors open at 8, show begins at 9
*If you give us the money to buy it and one for us each. Sorry we’re poor, hence the fundraiser.
WE say:
YOU SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT….Did I tell you to talk again!?! DO NOT make me come over there.
YOU say:
(weep)
WE say:
Oh God, Baby, we’re sorry we flipped out like that. You know we love you. We love you so much. We’re just on edge because we’re so excited that we get to do some amazing comedy stage readings at the HideOut this week. There will be prizes…you like prizes don’t you baby?
YOU say:
(weep) y-yes…
WE say:
And we’re gonna have two amazing bands play: Common Shiner and the BareHand JugBand playing with us. Common Shiner is voiced by Morgan Foster and is one of Chicago’s favorite pop/rock bands. Shhhh….calm down. You remember Morgan right?
YOU say:
You mean Long Pork’s stage manager?
WE say:
Yep! See, you’re okay! And BareHand JugBand is one of the greatest Jug Bands in the country, or so says the Minneapolis Battle of the Jug Bands! They are also an attractive band from thier spunky lady singers, to thier sassy Jug Player, and all the well dressed pluckin and slidin’ gentlemen folk inbetween. Does this sound like a good time to you? huh?
YOU say:
Well, I had plans on Thurs…
WE say:
But you’re gonna?….YOU’RE GONNA!?!?
YOU scream in fear:
SKIP THEM! I’M GONNA SKIP THEM!
WE say:
See…I love you.
RECAP!
What?: “Hit Yourself In The Face With A Guitar!” a night of comedy stage readings by the Gentlemen of Long Pork. Featuring performances by Common Shiner and the BareHand Jug Band. Where?: The HideOut (1354 W. Wabansia Ave, 60642) When?: Doors open at 8, show begins at 9 Why?: We love performing for you, there will be drink specials, lots of prizes to give away, and to raise monies for our NYC show! Huh?: See now you are just asking questions to be silly. Silly pretty people.
Basically dinosaurs and time travel are my, Zoran Horatio Rodriguez Gvojic’s, go to improv topics. Whether it’s a scene about a southern family, or scene about a family from the south, I’ll find some way to take my “Yes and” crowbar and jimmy these topics into the dialogue. Why do I do it you ask?
Well it all started in a small town in Helen, Georgia where my Uncle Triceratops fell off of a toilet seat and invented the flux capacitor. You see what I did there? I just improvised a backstory that involved both time travel and dinosaurs. It’s a sickness I tell you! If only there were some way to go back and stop myself from ever making a dinosaur time travel reference in an improv scene….
OH WAIT! There is!
(Running sounds)
(Car door opening sound)
(Time circuits turning on sound)
(Zoran explaining “This is wearing you’re going, this is where you are, this is where you were” to the audience sound)
(Ignition and tire squealing sound)
(Car Acceleration sound)
(Car accelerating past 80mph sound)
(Car accelerating past 85mph sound)
(Car accelerating past 86mph sound)
(Car accelerating past 87mph sound)
(Car hitting a brick wall at 88mph sound)
(Lonely car burning sound)
(Ambulance sound)
(Horrified Medic saying, “MY GOD!” sound)
(Zoran’s remains being zipped up in a coroner’s bag sound AKA a zipper sound)
(Parents planning a funeral sound)
(Funeral being interrupted by a herd of Gallimimus (Veggisaurus) sound)
(Parents selling the rights to Zoran’s story to Steven Spielberg and Robert Zemeckis sound)
(690 Million Dollar box office opening sound)
(Zoran being slapped in the back of the head by Lee, Seth, Charley, and Zack for writing this blog post sound)
The other night I went to the Kit Kat Lounge for some half price “Tini’s” with a few friends. They had a 2 page spread full of drinks with names only a stargazing teenage girl could dream up. “Snickerdoodle”, “Lavalamp”, and “Bradley Cooper” were all among the ranks, though to me they were worth only a taster’s sip. I could barely finish my “Black Widow”. Next time I’ll be sure to stick to the straight up Martini.
Oh, and I was molested by Tina Turner. This video is round 1. IF round 2 had been taped, you would be privy to the twisting of nipples — MINE– and an overall heightened sense of uncomfortableness.
We were featured on Beyond the Pedway today where we talked about sketch comedy, why we do it and the anatomy of a Long Pork show.
Also, tomorrow is the big day! Tomorrow night we are opening for Mr. Harold Ramis!
Here are the details:
Saturday March 20th, 2010
7:30pm – 9:30pm
Emanuel Congregation
5959 N. Sheridan Rd.
Chicago, IL 60660
You can buy tickets here and if you use the discount code of “LongPork” you’ll save $10. However, we’ve found out that Gold Star Tickets is selling them for a low-low price of $20 so we’re not questioning it, check them out here.
Anyway, we can’t wait to see you folks tomorrow night. If we haven’t met you before, please take a moment to come say hi and introduce yourself, we love making new friends!
We are insanely excited to have the honor to open for Harold Ramis at Emanuel Congregation this Saturday, March 20th at 7:30PM!
Harold Ramis will be joined by Aaron Freeman, a local Chicago comedian, who will lead their conversation on the meaning of life. No, big deal. Just the basics. Why are we here? What’s the reason we all love the smell of new markers? Why do dogs have better names than some kids? Simple questions I’m sure we’ve asked ourselves time and time again. Although, I imagine some of their questions may have more substance. Maybe.
Either way, we are excited and hope you can come out to see the show. It promises to be an amazing time.
You can purchase tickets from Brown Paper Tickets, use the code “longpork” for a discount!
You can also purchase tickets from Gold Star Tickets. They don’t mention anything about us, but trust us, we’ll be there.
We know….we know how dark it has been this winter and how miserable you’ve been. If you have been in Chicago, its been especially hard. We were just rated the 10th most miserable city in the country and if you are reading this elsewhere, then you are probably living in one of the 0ther 9 top contenders. Probably Cleveland. No matter what songs say, Cleveland sucks.
And for months now you have been checking this website for a little escapism. A place to get away to. A place where you can live amongst Vampires and Zombie Chefs, like we all dream of doing. But recently these dreams have gone stale. The Zombie just makes shake n’ bake for you now and you’ve now seen the elusive Vampires and they look like a stupid creature from Doctor Who.
You need something new to light your candle, wet your whistle, skin your grandmother and other such things! Well, you are in luck! LONG PORK HAS A NEW VIDEO!!! Yeppers you read correctly (Unless you are dyslexic then instead read this: LONG PORK VIDEO NEW A HAS)!!!! Great all on the same page now?!?
Check out our newest creation Greensleeves. This is the planting show everyone wishes was on thier local PBS station, because we all have planting show wishes that go year after year without being fulfilled.
So here you go! Have fun! And kiss your mom for us and apologize to her for that grandmother thing we said…
Voting is over for the Chicago Metromix “So You Think You Can Funny?” Contest.
We’d like to thank everyone that voted for us and to everyone that voted each day. We really appreciate the love and support. It was really down to the wire. We had a strong lead in the beginning, 13%, eventually dipping down lower and lower. We ended at 7%. Which is amazing when you think about it. A lot of people didn’t even get a percentage.
In short, we feel the love.
Somebody likes us… And it’s you.
And you want to know something… We like you too.
To find out the end-END results, check back on Dec.7th right.
In the meantime, we are working hard on new material, and new video’s, and new words for new. So that way when you come back to visit, you at least know a new word for new.
